Reading the Quran

I realised that it takes me only approximately 40 minutes to read half juzu' of the Quran. And had i discplinely read it twice a day on 40 minutes sitting each, i would have been able to complete reading the whole Quran in this month of Ramadhan. That is only 80 minutes of my 24 hours or 1,440 minutes day. Sometimes, success lies in putting your task into perspective. As much as it saddens me that this realisation comes a bit too late as Ramadhan comes to a close, i hope this lesson shall serve me well to continue with my amal of reading of the Quran, and set myself the target of completing reading the Quran again. Hopefully, it will become a norm for me enough tha by the time Ramadhan is upon me again next year ( Insya-Allah), i shall be more prepared and deserving of the rewards that come with it. Amiin.

My Ramadhan Report Card

Salams... Ramadhan is almost leaving us. Today is the last day of Ramadhan, and we Muslims will be celebrating Syawal Aidilfitri tomorrow. 

I feel like it was only yesterday Ramadhan was upon us. And today it is leaving us again... It will be another year before we will be graced by this holy month again. Has this Ramadhan been a fruitful one for me?

In perspective, i can probably say that it has been one of my more fruitful ones, if the Ramadhan of more recent years are compared to. On the same note howevevr, i can't really look back and say that I have done enough and taken full advantage of the benefits of the month in terms of my ibadah as a whole. I guess i started the month well with my Quran recitations and appreciation of the Quran. I ventured into reading the interpretation of the Quran on top of reciting it, and it gave me a deeper feeling of appreciation of it. Other aspects of my ibadah sort of grew from the beginning of the month, and I had the sense of peace and hope that it will grow stronger towards the end of the month, to peak and climax in time for the last 10 days of the month when the night of Qadar is said in the Quran to be upon us.

But alas, the momentum that i tried to build at the beginning did not last as long as I hoped, and i sort of gotten drag by the usual worldly preoccupation towards the end of it, barely managing to bring myself to improve upon my ibadah as Ramadhan comes to a close.

I feel ashamed of myself. I feel like being visited by a very special and most rewarding guest,whose visit had been awaited for the whole year. Whose visit had been longed and fondly missed, of which by the time it came, i shed a tear of joy because i had missed it so much. Sadly then, instead of cherishing the guest's presence, i behaved nonchalantly towards the end of its stay until time has run out and it is time for the guest to leave again. 

Forgive me ya Allah for allowing my ignorance to let this happen, again. 

My doa is that whatever small improvements that i have made to my ibadah over this last month, to be continued (istiqamah) and improved upon. The reading of the Quran. The sunnat prayers. The visits to the masjid. The jamaah in solat. The reading of Islamic books. If anything, I pray that my istiqamah will be my saving grace from this Ramadhan, and that i will be given the chance yet again to try and make amends, and be a most thankful and appreciative host of the next Ramadhan in the coming year. Amiin.