Tadaa!!

Tadaa!!

Guess what? See the 'users online' count on the left side of this screen? I've made another leap (by my standards laa..) in improving this blog. Been wanting put the user tracker on my blog for some time now, but I've neither had the time nor the know-how to do it. Been doing some blog hopping and learning to do it by viewing the source of other people's blogs. Don't worry, I wasn't copying anyone's layouts or ideas, I was just learning how some people put up some stuffs and applications on their blogs to make them look interactive. Hopefully I won't get sued for infringement of copyright rules. :p

I've always wondered if there's anyone out there apart from myself that comes by this blog at any one time. It's hard to say, but judging from the lack of comments and tags that I'm getting, the possibility seems to point at none. With this user tracker now, I would at least be able to know for sure. Hehe..

To anyone out there dropping by, would love it if you could leave your footprints here in some way. It would go some way to making the place merrier. ;-)

Night night.

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith



No, no... this is not a movie review. I think I could leave that part to a lot of other websites on the internet dedicated to the movie. I am not that good at doing reviews anyway, and I might just end up spoiling the story for you given my lack of story telling skills. But just to be on the safe side, there might just be accidental spoilers ahead. So those who have yet to watch the movie, you've been warned.

My general feeling about the movie: it was great, and much better than the first 2 instalments. As I have yet to watch the last 3 episodes of the Star Wars series, I would stop short from saying that this 3rd instalment was the best of em all. Most of you Star Wars fans out there would have figured it out anyway that the 3 prequels were made to tell the story of the making of Darth Vader. So most of the people flocking to the cinema to watch Revenge of The Sith would be anticipating how Anakin finally succumbed to the darkside. Which probably explains why the first 2 intsalments were relative bores. It seems to me like George Lucas might have come up with the story for Revenge first and struggled to make up stories for the first 2 movies to come to the climax. The plot was more purposeful, and the storyline more solid. And the light sabre fighting scenes were awesome.

I could sense how much awaited the Revenge was when the movie started rolling, everyone in the cinema was applauding it. Hehe... to be quiet honest, I actually felt like applauding myself. Before the movie started, I could see some people talking to strangers sitting next to them discussing the movie. It felt like a Star Wars convention of sort, and it was going to be the last. Unless George Lucas comes with more sequels or prequels after this one. Personally, I was thinking it would be rather fun if prequels were made of the making of Yoda. Hehe... just a passing thought.

Possible spoilers ahead. All in all, the movie ended giving me a feel of melancholy. The thought of someone succumbing to the darkside through sacrifice and love for someone does make a great story line for a tragic love story. History have shown in the past how good people have turned bad through sacrifice for loved ones, confusion, and other bad elements taking advantage of other's helplesness. But it does make a great story line. And for that, I think George Lucas have done a great job in making this latest and probably last instalment of Star Wars a very watchable one.

Go and see it!

Of Competitions and Beauty Pageants

Of Winning Competitions and Beauty Pageants

I can't work. I can't even begin to focus myself to get down to serious work this morning. I feel more like surfing the net in the office (big offense ooo..), or just sit down and do nothing. And the fact that 60% of my colleagues are on leave today probably doesn't help either. And goodness no one has been looking for me yet this morning. It feels kinda tranquil at the moment, though I suspect it's just another calm before the storm. That typifies the job in accounts and finance where our task is pretty much cyclical. Middle of the month, especially the early months of the financial year is whe I'm relatively idle, and it's the perfect time for me to start tidying up my ever-untidy cubicle. When I feel like it...

I guess I know why I find it so hard to focus today. Been a bit side tracked since yesterday when I found out that I am one of the lucky winners of 2 tickets to watch the 3rd part of the Star Wars Trilogy: Revenge of The Sith at KLCC TGV cinema tonight. There was a competition to come up with captions for a picture of Obi Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker slugging it out with their light sabres. Since they were giving away 100 tickets, I just thought, what the heck... I'll just send an entry. They are giving out a 100 tickets, so there's always a good chance of winning anyway. Sent my entry like 2 minutes before the dateline, and wallaa... today I'm one of the lucky winners to the show tonight. Had I have to buy the ticket myself, I would have waited at least 2 weeks after the movie opens in Malaysia before I go and watch it. You know la what the queue is like when a movie of Star Wars' following opens in Malaysia...

Another interesting matter that came to my attention recently which has a slight relation to the subject of winning competitions is the subject of Malaysia's Miss Malaysia / Universe 2004, Ms Andrea Fonseka. I've never been a follower of beauty pageant show, and when they do show it on tv, I would usually catch the end of the show to see who's won it. Since Miss Malaysia in the past (with exception of a few, I think) has rarely managed to progress anywhere beyond the first round, I never got to know how our Miss Malaysia look like. So when I received pictures of her yesterday in my mailbox, I almost thought the picture was a spoof. My first response was, this can't be real. So I made some sleuthing work this morning and surfed the net a bit to find out more about her. My, my... could this really be the most beautiful woman in Malaysia last year?

Malaysia's Most Beautiful Woman in 2004?

Don't get me wrong. I am not saying that she's ugly. On any other stage, any male could easily warm up to her typical oriental good looks. However, her physique is not one you would imagine to be strutting on the Miss Universe stage. Some harsh comments have been made about her in the media, and you could also find some bloggers having a field day writing about her. Makes you feel pity for the lass. But come on la, would I ever enrol myself in Mr Malaysia, if I already know so well the only thing that protrudes about me is not even a muscle but some flabby fat hanging above my abdomen? You'd know the answer to that already...

That raises the question whether she knew what she was getting herself into. Or perhaps the more popular question, how did she ever become Miss Malaysia that year? Stories are rife about her connections with the organisers of the Miss Malaysia contest, and that the supposed most beautiful woman of the contest did not win. It's either that, or the standards of the women participating in the contest that year had plummetted to a historical low. The good thing about it though, is that it must have made anybody who is anybody feels like even they could become Miss Malaysia. But on a negative note, imagine the impression that the world audience gets from the globally televised Miss Universe, which is advertised as where The World's Most Beautiful People meet, and find that we're represented by Ms Fonseka. Again, I have nothing against her. I would say again that I think she is an attractive lady in her own right, but a Miss Universe material? Hmmm...

Ramble.. ramble..

Ramble.. ramble..

Unlike in the past couple of weeks, I've not had many ideas to write of late. Is this what aspiring writers usually call the writer's block? Maybe.. I don't know. I would love to owe part of it to my demanding work schedule, but strangely of late work has not been hounding me as bad. I have to say, April 2005 marks the most entry I've made in a month. Perhaps I should be proud of that.

This last weekend I finally managed to drag myself to do some revision for my ACCA exam this June. Reading the first few pages of my revision notes and book, I could almost hear the chinks of old machinery in my head, as I awoke my brain once again to the art of studying and revision. To be honest, I had never been that great in the art. My days in pre-university and university days were more marked for my escape acts, where I would somehow miraculously made it through my exams unscathed with minimal, close to nil, revision. And to be honest, the results weren't that great either la. I am fortunate however that I will be taking the exam with my wife this time, who has been an excellent motivator-cum-disciplinarian to me. Love you dear... ;-).

Among the highlights of last week which I wished to write about is the end of The Amazing Race Season 7. Feeling a bit sad that the season has come to an end. I guess the winning couple Uchenna and Joyce deserved it. I have to respect Uchenna for his gentlemanly ways. I felt that he never lost his values throughout the race and managed to keep Joyce's spirits high despite of all the obstacles they had to go through. Rob and Amber were also a favourite of mine. Rob was brushing everyone's feathers in the show. There was one episode when they were in India, and they had to push this heavy elephant statue along a busy Indian road. Rob was pulling out Indian kids from the sides of the road and made them push the elephant with him and Amber like no one's business, and then slyly remarked 'it is tough organising Indian labour'. I tell you, the fella is so selamba. Though it was easy to hate him, you can't help thinking that Amber and him were very good and probably were the best to win the race anyway. And who could forget the golden couple, Meredith and Gretchen. I was rooting for them until they got eliminated. They went as far as they could, and it was nice while they were still in it. Mind you, not bad for a couple their age to be in the last four.

Ok la. Back to work!

Exploding Toads

Exploding Toads

Get this. Taken from the UK daily The Independent Online on 8th May 2005.

Stone the crows! Exploding toad case solved
By Ruth Elkins in Berlin
08 May 2005
After weeks of flummoxing scientists, Germany's great exploding toads mystery has been solved. They were gruesomely murdered by crows with a taste for foie gras.
Health officials in Hamburg started to panic after some 1,000 toads puffed up and exploded last month, their entrails splattering an area of up to a square metre. The tabloid press went into overdrive, dubbing the carnage site in Hamburg's Altona district the "Pond of Death" and warning children and dogs to stay away. Theories ran wild that toads were committing suicide or were croaking because of a virus spread by South American race horses. But now one of Germany's top experts on amphibians says he's cracked the case. Frank Mutschmann, who examined both dead and living Hamburg specimens at his Berlin research centre, found all had identical circular incisions on their backs, small enough to be the work of a bird's beak. Then he found something strange: their livers were missing. "There were no bite or scratch marks, so we knew the toads weren't being attacked by a raccoon or rat, which would have also eaten the entire toad," he said. "It was clearly the work of crows, which are clever enough to know the toad's skin is toxic and realise the liver is the only part worth eating.
"Only once the liver is gone does the toad realise it's been attacked. It puffs itself up as a natural defence mechanism. But since it doesn't have a diaphragm or ribs, without the liver there is nothing to hold the rest of its organs in. The lungs stretch out of all proportion and rip; the rest of the organs simply expel themselves."
The toads' grisly deaths are, in fact, a well-documented phenomenon. First recorded in Germany in 1968, exploding toads have been reported in the country, as well as in Belgium, Denmark and America. Hamburg's toads started to explode during their week-long mating season. Dr Mutschmann believes the crows went in for the kill when the toads were too busy enjoying the heights of sexual excitement. "They would have noticed something as the crow pecked at them, but it wouldn't have been particularly painful," he said.
The riddle solved, the question now is whether to exact revenge on the crows. Toads, much-loved in Germany, are a protected species. But so are crows. "I've had several angry emails," said Dr Mutschmann. "But there's no reason to worry. It's just a part of nature."

How gruesome. Death in the midst of the ultimate excitement. Hehe...

I miss reading the UK papers.

For the original source, go here...

http://news.independent.co.uk/europe/story.jsp?story=636520

Feeling Good

Feeling Good

I am feeling good this morning. Yesterday was a public holiday, given that May Day fell on a Sunday. I am not sure what you think, but I feel the good thing about public holiday falling on a Monday sort of reduces the blues of having to come back to work. Strange tho it might sound, but having to start work today doesn't come with the normal blues and the Ray Charles music in my head as it does had it been Monday. Weird... Had a very well rested labour day yesterday. Slept on the couch for almost 4 hours yesterday afternoon. I guess that probably explains the good mood today. Ntah la..

Alright lah, need to get back to work. Need to accomplish a couple of things. Have so many things to write about this last weekend. Maybe I'll keep that for later today once I get home.

Have a good week y'all.

Brain Conflict

Brain Conflict

Every morning feels like a drag to work now, and I was close to taking an emergency leave today. Morale and motivation are definitely not at the best level these days, and I've been looking forward to the weekend since this last Monday. Fair enough I feel, since I've had to come to work last Saturday and Sunday anyway. Half of my brain now tells me 'you have a lot more work to do', while the other half of it saying 'p**s off!!'. Yup, at times like this I wonder how I manage to get myself to work.

Ok la.. to be fair, I'm paid to be here from 8 to 5 to get things done, so I'll let the former half of my brain win today. It's the right thing to do anyway. Come tomorrow till Monday, my latter half of the brain will win hands down.

For now, have to psyche myself up.. Izwan Boleh!

Feeling Lucky

Feeling Lucky

I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?
- Dirty Harry, 1971 -

It's been a rather hectic beginning to the week. As matter of fact, I can't really point out exactly when my week began, since this past Saturday and Sunday were working days for me. The amount of work that they're giving us, and not to mention the increasingly unrealistic datelines they're demanding makes me feel like reporting my employers to Suhakam. Crazy.. crazy...

Anyhow, though my weekend was somehow spoilt by having to come to work, it turned out to be an enjoyable weekend for me nevertheless. The highlight of the weekend was definitely sending my car for tinting. It cost us a cool RM 1,400, and boy am I glad it times very well with my pay day. By the time I took my money out to get the tinting done, the balance in my bank account was down to 3 figures only. Not only that, they were 3 figures threatening to come down to 2. So the fact that pay day was 3 days after we've done the extra addition to the Matrix was a real help. The car feels complete now, and I've behaved like a small kid with a new toy. Jakun sket..

My ears are acting up again. I've been having this consistent problem with my hearing since I was 17. No, it's not symptoms of old age thank you. It's just that the wax in my ears have this tendency of hardening and block my eardrums. Been going to the ENT specialists on average once every 3 years now when the wax gets too hard that they have to perform a minor jet-spray treatment to remove it. The wax in my ears are threatening to get hard again now it seems. It isn't too bad now though that only one ear is affected. But there have been instances when both of my ears will get blocked and I would become partially deaf for a while. Just as recently as 3 years ago this happened to me and I could barely hear a thing for almost a week until the ENT specialist performed the routine jet-spray treatment on me. It was a bloody miserable week for me as I could barely hear and I would have to ask people to speak louder and repeat whatever they were saying. I remember watching TV at that time and I had to turn on the volume so loud that I could practically feel the sofa I was sitting on vibrating from the loud noise from the TV. Not to mention the noise it made in the house. My brother in law just got home at the same time and he claimed to have heard the noise as he parked the car. To be honest, I wished I could have turned the TV volume louder as even all that wrecking noise it was making were whispers to me.

The experience has made me to reflect countless of times and made me to count my blessings. It has given me the opportunity to have a taste of what the deaf experiences and the frustration that comes with being in a world of silence. Yeah, it is very frustrating I tell you. Very often we take for granted these simple but crucial blessings that God gifts us; the blessing of our basic 5 senses. In moments of deprivation do we realise how lucky we have been.

I do feel lucky. And blessed too.

*Sigh*

*Sigh*

I think I'm pretty much in a weekend mood already. My workstation is once again a big pile of mess, just one week after I've done a major spring cleaning here. i think I need to go on a vacation of some sort, and be away from the office for a long, long, time. I feel like driving around in my Matrix in a country of mountains and wide open land, and just drive around without any care in the world. And stay over in a country cottage where there's no chance someone would be looking for me.

Oh how I wish...

Mood to work has deserted me completely at this moment. I just feel like running off and have an early weekend. So many things to do, and so many things to remember. And I've been playing catch up for a while now, that it exasperates me. I have to say, my self esteem is not at its best at this point in time.

2 more hours and I'm outta here...

A Happy Day!

A Happy Day!

I'm so darn busy this week, but I have to get this off my chest before I begin the day.

The Happy Song

Kalau rasa gembira tepuk tangan..
Clap.. clap.. clap..
Kalau rasa gembira tepuk tangan..
Clap.. clap.. clap..
Kalau rasa gembira beginilah caranya..
Kalau rasa gembira tepuk tangan..
Clap.. clap.. clap..

Man do I feel good this morning. In fact, the build up to my such good feeling today had started since yesterday, when I went to JPJ to register my car. Yup, that's it folks. I've finally got my Matrix baby. We arrived at JPJ Wangsa Maju at 8.30 am yesterday, which was actually rather late if you intend to bid for the good numbers. We had listed down a few numbers for bidding, and I was quite keen on this one particular number, 3389, which was in fact similar to my father's authentic Volvo's number. But amazingly, the number was taken up in the space of 15 minutes while we were waiting to be called to the counter to register. We managed to get another number on our list however. Our list was courtesy of our car dealer, who is a nice Chinese guy and apparently very literate with the meanings of numbers. The number we got in the end was 3963, and it apparently means 'easy to get rich', or so he says. My father on the other hand said the 2 numbers in the middle somehow implied a 'reversed' playboy, apparently refering to the misplaced '69'. Haha... We were lucky that there weren't too many people registering their vehicles yesterday, and the registration process that usually would have taken up 2 hours, were completed in only half an hour. Nasib baikk...

Drove the car home last night with a coat hangar stuck in my mouth, smiling all the way home. There's no describing the feeling of driving the car out of the showroom. And this morning, I arrived at the office about half an hour late. Was being extra careful on the road; no ciluk2 (jumping queues) this morning, and it was the first time in my recorded memory that I took more than 5 minutes to park my car. *sigh* I think it's a normal behaviour that comes with having something new... hehe..

Will be sending the car for V-Kool installation this weekend. Then my new Matrix will be complete. Insya-Allah and Alhamdulillah...

Ok la back to work. Can't believe I've written this long already. Before that, another happy song for the road:

Mari kita..Mari kita..
Bergembira tepok tangan sama sama
Kita menari sambil langgar kanan kiri
Goyang badan goyang kaki
Hooree hooree
Hip hip hooree
Hooree hooree hooree hooree
Hip hip hooree hooree hooree
Bergembira, bergembira
Ha ha ha ha
La la la la la la la la la.........

An Alarming Morning

An Alarming Morning

The whole house was wokened up by the house security alarm this morning. The alarm triggered off around 5 this morning, and yours truly was in the bathroom setting out for some toilet business. And to add coincidence to the story, there was also a separate incident happening in the bathroom just before the alarm was triggered; i had an encounter with a cockroach of grandfather-sized proportion, which apparently was as surprised and horrified to see me as I was to see it. The cockroach actually tried to find a place to hide, attempting to squeeze itself through the small holes of the sift that drains the water from the bathroom to the gutter outside. Back in the days when it was of a relatively quaint size, it would have probably escaped. Fat cockroach had no such luck this time and I went for the kill.

It was actually quite skillful in dodging the gayung i was using to wham it, and it actually had the nerve to make a counter attack on me. While I was clobbering away maddeningly, hitting the brave roach a couple of times slightly, that was when the alarm triggered off and my attention was immediately taken away to more serious concern.

The memory of my house being broken into in October last year suddenly came back rushing in my mind, and instinctively I grabbed a long spear that was in my room (which my father must have gotten from the many souvenirs he received while he was serving in Sarawak) and went out to check what was going on. Outside in the living room was my father, clad only in his kain sarong and a long sword in his hands, apparently prepared for any possibility. While we might have looked like rejected extra casts from The Lord of The Rings, the anxiety we felt was real. We went and inspected hurriedly at the possible points where we felt the house might have been broken through, bracing for any possibility. It was at this point that I only began to realise, I was only clad in a towel.

The indicator on the alarm control system showed that the breach or its attempt that prompted the alarm was made from my room and my brother's. However, we couldn't find any signs of attempt to break into the house anywhere. As the mystery deepened and anxiety escalated, I mentioned about my personal duel with the heroic roach earlier. Apparently, the impact of my bangings of the gayung on the tile floor caused enough vibration to set off the security alarm, which had a sensor placed at the toilet's ventilator.

There were nervous sighs of relief at this confession of mine all over in the house, and we were prepared to dismiss the incident due to that. We then set about to get ourselves ready for Subuh. But could that really be the reason for triggering the alarm? Or could someone actually tried to breach into our house through the ventilator of my bathroom, and somehow clumsily ran off triggering the alarm, at the sound of the bangings that I was making in the bathroom? Hmm... I don't know. We checked the windows and the ventilator from outside this morning and there were no signs of attempted forced entry.

I went back to my bathroom after we reset the alarm, getting ready for Subuh. To my surprise, the badly wounded roach was still running around looking for escape. Must have been one of those dim ones (and mightily strong as well) I guess, still running about unable to figure out where to hide after all that time.

I took the aerosol can and got it out of its misery.

What a way to start off the weekend.

Decisions... Decisions...

Decisions... Decisions...

Life is full of decisions. At the moment, I feel like there is so many for me to make. Decisions to make at work, at home, in my personal life, in my relations with friends and families etc. Suddenly i feel as though I have to make decisions on so many things at the same time that my head feels like bursting.

I guess it doesn't help that I'm the kinda person you can describe as crisis-shirker. Meaning I would usually avoid confrontations, or situations where I would be required to make a critical decision. When the going gets tough, I choose to have a coffee break instead, rather than buff up and get tough. I know it is not right, and I'm still conditioning myself to get better at handling problems life sometimes offers you.

The biggest decision I've had to make this year was buying a new car. Ohh.. haven't I mentioned this before? I decided that I would need a bigger car than my previous 2-door Satria. Thought of making do with wifey's Kelisa in the short term to help our budget, but with car prices expected to go up in the next couple of months, I guess I had to make a move soon. And what car is it?



The drool-inducing Matrix


At RM74k (on the road price, insurance and additional accessories included), I find it a good steal. We're pretty much in the process of finalising the purchase deal. The only thing that's stalling the process is the fact that I do not yet have enough money to supplement my car loan. I have to cough up an additional RM14k or so to make the deal complete. To be honest, it's not that i do not have the money. Remember the Satria I've offloaded? I actually make around RM20k from the sale of that car. And my inability to get my hands on that money is a problem that stands out like a sore thumb with me now.

Some people say making deals with friends is not so different from dealing with the devil himself. Oh well, ok... I made that up. But really, you know what the attitude is like when you make deals with friends or families. The theme would usually be 'lebih kurang'. 'Alaa... dengan member pun nak berkira ke, lebih kurang je laa...' is the order of the day. The friend or family member you're dealing with would expect you to give them some lee-way if they somehow do not come good with their promise or part of the bargain. And the problem is more often than not, you will end up more on the 'kurang' side than on the 'lebih'. Mana boleh tahann...

I offloaded the Satria to a close friend who promised me to give me the proceeds in a month's time, and mind you, we made this deal in early Feb 05. And now it'd mid April 05 already. What pisses me off is that why did he make such promise when he knew it was going to be difficult for him to come good with it? And what pisses me of further is that I still have to pay the car's loan monthly instalments until the car has been sold. Ok la, to be fair to him, he is selling the car for me and not buying it from me. He does second hand car dealership in his part time you see. But had he been honest with me about what the real scenario would have been, I wouldn't have been so annoyed. I would have at least planned my finances accordingly. Or maybe offloaded it elsewhere.

So let that be a lesson to you Izwan...

On another note, after a looong contemplation, I've finally decided to register for my ACCA exams in June 2005. That proved to be another tough decision to make. Coughed out GBP 153 for the registration just now, so really have to hit the books in the next month and a half.

Not to mention reduce the visits to San Francisco Coffee to stay easy on the wallet... :-(

How To Make an Izwan

How To Make an Izwan

How to make a Izwan

Ingredients: 1 part friendliness 3 parts silliness 3 parts leadership

Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little lustfulness if desired!

Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

Jogging!

Jogging!

Managed to get away from the office for an hour or so for a session of jogging today. The chance to do so is very rare these days, when I could not be seen leaving my workstation earlier than 7 pm without getting groans of disapproval from many. I would love to say that it's due to my unquestionable popularity here, but if only that was true. Everybody needs answers to their requests and queries pronto from me, and honestly there are times when I even forget what i was going to do on any given day to begin with.

Been piling up the weight like no one's business, so hopefully the 45 minutes jog session would do me good.

Any Given Sunday

Any Given Sunday

For the first time in weeks, yesterday's Sunday turned out to be a normal one for me. Normal in a sense that I could do whatever I wanted to do on any given Sunday. What I'm getting at is that it was the first Sunday in the last couple of weeks that I didn't have to come to the office and instead spent it like anyone would on a normal Sunday.

I think it has a relaxing effect on me already. I'm not as grouchy and as negative come Monday morning. All work and no play does make Izwan a very groucy boy... The Monday blues effect is somehow less. I do believe that to be effective, you have to have a good balance of work and play. But really, when it comes to it, work can be real murder.

Went to Midvalley Megamall with wifey yesterday. Main mission: to get a baby monitor for baby Hannah. We had surveyed KLCC for it, but every store we went that sells baby products seem to have sold it out. Luckily, Jayajusco in Megamall has it, and now my sister could be more flexible to be around the house. The baby monitor showed how practical it could be already yesterday when we were having dinner last night. I had a quick eerie sense when the baby monitor suddenly came to live, the one that sort of reminded you to movies like Signs or The Ring. First came the static sound for the first 10 seconds or so, and then the cries that the baby made. It's a wonderful gadget nevertheless, that it would catch the slightest of sounds the baby makes, but not other light sounds in the background (e.g. the fan, walking movements etc). So it was a day of wonderful discovery for yours truly...;-).

Also bought myself 2 long sleeve shirts for work while in Midvalley. My wife said that my other shirts are getting a bit worn out. So today, i'm wearing one of those I bought yesterday. It gives me that sense of newness today... no wonder I don't feel the blues so much. Hehe... and to cap the wonderful day, we had ice cream at Baskin Robbins before leaving for home. And just to share such a wonderful feeling I had yesterday, I bought 2 more quarts of Baskins to take away home for the whole family.

And that's what I call a real Sunday... ;-)

Wish I Was Elsewhere

Wish I Was Elsewhere

Hi there. It has been another long hiatus eh? I guess some people are beginning to get used to that fact on this blog. Yup, the blue moon comes by as often as my updates. I'm really sorry folks (like there's really anyone out there anymore!), but I've been so preoccupied (the usual excuse eh?). This time of the year, the month of March and April to be exact, is a humongously busy time for people in my line. Well, I know, I know... I can almost hear murmurs at the back saying my updates have always been few and far in between at any time in the year... *sigh*..

Ok la.. so maybe it's just a lame reason for lack of updates. Having said that, I'm in the office today, even though Saturday is not an official working day for my company. Forever trying to tie up loose ends... it's that time of the year of audit, reports, and company board meetings. It's that time of the year when bilis in the company like me gets enmeshed in the sambal for the nasi lemak that's to be served to the big fishes...

Some metaphor...

Honestly, though my body is here, my mind has been all over the place this morning. Here's a list of places I would rather be this point of time:

1. In bed... I could just sleep the whole morning.
2. In front of the TV watching the Amazing Race.
3. At the cinemas, contemplating on what show to watch in the afternoon.
4. Queenstown, New Zealand. Couldn't get enough of the place.
5. Anywhere else but here...

There are some other things on my mind that's been bugging me off late, but maybe that's for another entry.

At the moment, I have to hold on tight to the reins that's holding my mind from running away from my body, and get some work done.

Welcome Hannah!

Welcome Hannah!

Last Sunday, 6th March 2005 was a very happy moment for my family. My elder sister Lili, safely gave birth to the cutest baby girl. Welcome to the family Hannah!

Her birth was also close to being coincidental with Lili’s own birthday, which is on the 4th of March. I guess the baby wanted my sister to be over with her birthday dinners and celebrations first before deciding to come out to this world. We took my sister out for her birthday dinner on the night of the 5th of March 2005, and after dinner we had her cut her birthday cake. I could see that night that she was looking very tired. I felt a sense of pity and admiration looking at her that night. I asked her how was she feeling as she edged closer towards her labour. She replied in her usual good spirits,’I can’t wait to get this over with’.

The next day after Subuh she was bleeding. My brother in law took her to the hospital, and the doctor said she was beginning to come into labour. When I arrived at the hospital later that morning, she looked in agony. Man, that must have been the first time I saw my sister in such pain and agony, and she had not even gone to the labour room yet! I noticed that my mum and my sister’s mother-in-law were by her side, giving words of calm and encouragement. I have to say la, these 2 mothers were very calm. My brother-in-law on the other hand, looked understandably anxious and nervous.

Wonderfully, my sister wasn’t in labour for too long. As a matter of fact, it was a very short while. She went into the labour room at 11.45am, with very minimal contraction at that time. I was already contemplating spending the rest of the day at the hospital. By 12.30pm however, my brother-in-law appeared from the labour room with the new-born Hannah. Alhamdulillah... I’ve heard of stories where the mother goes through contraction for hours. Someone even told me that the average time of contraction for the first born child is about 12 hours. So to get it over with in less than an hour is a God gift.

I guess Hannah must have heard what my sister said the night before... :-).

Will try to get her pics on the blog next. Stay tuned!

Loser Test

Loser Test

I feel kind of a loser doing this test, but being in the office at 6.46pm waiting for my brother to finish work before I could go home, I just had nothing better to do. (Lots to do actually, but not gonna think about it now...)

So here's the result of my test. I'm kinda cool it seems. Really? It kinda make me kind of a loser as well, doesn't it? Hah... who cares.

Another Monday Morning Rambling and A Perfect Wedding Gift

Another Monday Morning Rambling and A Perfect Wedding Gift

It is now 11 in the morning, and I think my brain has finally woken up to work. It took a cup of Neslo, and a few dunks of Oreo biscuit to get my brains cracking however. Lucky, with the office deserted today, I could afford the luxury of a slow start today. It’s a Monday morning in the last week of the year, and the office resembles the presence of the post-Hari Raya holidays. Many people are desperate to finish off their leaves before the new year... lucky sods.

I spent most of the weekend helping out at my aunt’s place to prepare for my cousin’s engagement, which took place yesterday. Come to think of it, it was only slightly more than a year ago when I got engaged to my wife. Wow, does time fly... more and more of my younger cousins are either getting engaged or married, and boy it makes me feel old. It is very easy for me to fall into nostalgic mode when I look at my nieces and nephews (all children of my cousins) and reminisce the days when my cousins and I were their age. Those were the days when we had little care in the world and the highlight of our lives were either birthday parties or family gatherings such as yesterday, where all the cousins would gather and we would play games like hide-and-seek or police sentry. Sigh... life was so simple then.

Talking about engagements and weddings, I received the following story from a friend this morning. I know now the perfect item to buy for a wedding gift... :-p.


> Suasana masih riuh di luar. Sanak saudara semuanya
> berkampung disini. Gelak ketawa, gurau senda jelas
> kedengaran. Aku memimpin isteriku ke dalam bilik
> pengantin. Suara-suara sumbang terlalu banyak yang
> menegurku.
>
> "Hai, malam masih muda, dah nak masuk tidur?" sapa
> Pak Ucu.
>
> "Orang muda bang Aji, biarlah. Air dah penuh kat
> kepala tu." sahut Pak Tam; disambut hilai ketawa sanak
> saudara yang lain.
>
> Meriah sungguh keadaan diluar walau jam sudah
> menunjukkan pukul 11.00 malam.
>
> Hadiah yang masih belum dibuka ku susun ke tepi.
> Lampu ku tutup. Merebah diri ke katil pengantin, aku
> menoleh ke arah isteriku.
>
> "Kita tidur dulu lah yer. Ramai sangat orang kat
> luar tu." Isteriku hanya mengangguk tanda setuju.
>
> Entah pukul berapa sekarang, aku pun tidak tahu.
> Keadaan di luar gelap gelita dan senyap sunyi. Tanda
> sanak saudaraku telah pulang dan keluargaku
> telah tidur.
>
> Jari jemariku lembut membelai rambutnya. Ku selak
> rambut ikal yang menutupi telinganya lalu membisikkan
> "Assalammualaikum!" ke telinganya untuk menguji
> isteriku.
>
> "Wa alaikummussalam." Rupanya isteriku masih belum
> tidur.
>
> Ku kucup pipi halusnya. Ku kucup dahinya yang mulus.
> Semerbak harumnya menusuk deria bauku. Akanku tunaikan
> tanggungjawabku sebagai suami malam ini. Jari-jemari
> ini terus membelai tubuhnya.
>
> Perasaanku tidak dapat dikawal
> lagi, namun...
>
> "Kringgggggggggggggg...."
>
> "Tik..tik..tik..tik..."
>
> "Kring..krong..kring..krong"
>
> "Tooott..Tooott...Toott"
>
> "Buzzzz....Buzzzzz..Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"
>
> Bunyi-bunyi jam loceng entah dari mana memenuhi
> ruang bilikku. Terkejut dengan segala macam bunyi yang
> ada, aku membuka lampu. Serentak itu, terang
> benderang seluruh rumahku. Bunyi-bunyi ini telah
> berjaya membangunkan semua orang di rumahku.
>
> Aku mencari-cari punca bunyi-bunyi itu. Mataku
> terarah ke sekotak hadiah yang masih terbalut rapi.
> Aku buka dengan pantas dan di dalamnya terdapat 5
> buah jam loceng.
>
> Juga sekeping kad berbunyi...
>
> Selamat Pengantin Baru,
>
> Jangan gopoh-gopoh. Baru Pukul 2 pagi.
> Jangan maree.. kami potong stim...
>
> Dalam hatiku.. cilakak punya kengkawan. Potong stim
> betullah!!!
>
> TAMAT
>
> P/S:
> if 100 kengkawan bagi 10 jam loceng = 1000 jam loceng,
>
>
> 100 jam diset pukul 12.00malam
> 100 lagi diset pukul 1.00pagi
> 200 diset pukul 2.00pagi
> 200 diset pukul 3.00pagi
> 200 diset pukul 4.00pagi
> 100 diset pukul 5.00pagi
> 100 diset pukul 6.00pagi.
>
> Boleh haru biru rumah pengantin.... Tapi takpe boleh buka
> kedai jam lepas malam pertama.

On A Bingeing Spree

On A Bingeing Spree

I’ve been in the habit of bingeing lately. Hardly an hour passes by without me stuffing myself with snacks or junk food. Karipap, biskut bantal, Cheesters (would you believe they actually sell this in big packs for RM1.99 in Cold Storage KLCC? Heck you even get one free from buying one!), kuih koci... you name it, I will eat it. I seem to have developed a craving for sweet and MSG-rich food, and this does not seem to go very well with my wife. Already, she’s planning to place a restriction of fast food and junk food alike on me, and if she has it her way, I will only be eating fast food once a month beginning 1st January 2005. At the moment, I’m negotiating with her to make that 3 times a month, to cater for 3 different fast food joints. I can’t imagine having to choose among KFC, McDonalds, and Burger King in any one month. That will be a difficult decision to make... :-p

Back to my bingeing habit, it’s been worrying me a bit. As a result of it, I’ve gained a horrifying 3 kilos to my frame in the last 2 weeks, and my craving is not showing any signs of ebbing away. I’ve put extra effort on my work out sessions to slow down the weight gain, while trying to curb this food bingeing habit at the same time. I fear should this weight gain trend continues, by end of this week, I shall be plump enough to impersonate father Christmas. Ho-Ho-Ho... Verryy Funnyy!!

Ok.. ok... back to work! :-p

Another Monday: Return of The Blues.

Another Monday: Return of The Blues.

Another Monday morning. Another Monday blues. Am feeling less motivated to work today. Strange. I had done a major spring cleaning to my almost pig-sty-like workplace last Thursday and Friday, and the place is much clearer and cleaner now. Thought that I’d be more motivated to work with a cleaner workplace. Turns out it makes me feel more relaxed and lazy. I guess I work better in a disorderly place where everything is all over the place to remind me of the things that I have to do. Now that everything is kept nicely in files and folders, I become a bit clueless of what to do next. Either that, or I’m just suffering from the Monday morning blues.

I had a good weekend however. Stayed at home mostly, then did some chores which I had been wanting to do. Most interestingly, my wife and I managed to muster ourselves out of bed on Sunday morning and took a morning walk and jog at the Royal Lake Garden. It required an iron will to leave the lovely bed and blanket on only one of two mornings when I could afford morning lie-ins in a week, but in the end it was more than worth it. Heck, I am even planning to make it a permanent feature after this for the both of us. Apart from getting the chance to be alone with wifey, exercising in the morning makes me feel good throughout the day. After our morning walk, we went to the Orchid Garden nearby to get some shoots of orchids. Definitely not one of my usual weekends...:-). My father couldn’t believe that this son of his was trying out at gardening. This son who would usually catch blisters from a half hour sweeping of leaves on the house lawn. Unbelievable? Believe it! Hehe...

Was actually planning to pot the orchids yesterday. But we had promised my mum’s maid to take her out to shopping for stuffs ahead of her holiday to her hometown in Jogjakarta end of this month. By the time we got home from the shopping expedition (shopping always is an expedition for me!), we were too exhausted to even contemplate gardening. So I had to postpone putting on my gardening gloves till today.

Anyhow, I had better get to work now. The good thing about this blog is it gives me the needed inspiration for me to jumpstart my day. Usually, after writing a few paragraphs, my mind would have worked out enough for me to remember the next deadline that I have to meet. Cam dengki la pulak... :-p

Later!

Raya Hangover

Raya Hangover

I have been back in the office since yesterday when the official holiday for Hari Raya ended, and boy, have I been struggling to find the motivation to do any useful work in the office. Heck, I didn’t even have any drive to write anything for the blog yesterday. The office was as good as empty, apart from 2-3 of my colleagues who chose to come back from the holiday early. All the bosses won’t be around till next Monday, and as the saying goes in Malay, when the cat’s not around the mouses come out to dance. Hmm.. I think that’s how the saying sounds like anyway...

I just got back from a morning coffee break with wifey just now at San Francisco Coffee House. Needed to have something to jumpstart my day, since I’ve been on the verge of power failure since yesterday. And boy do I feel better (albeit a little) after a dose of cafe mocha, hence this entry I guess. To be honest, I’m still very much in a holiday mood, and while my seemingly ever-horizontal-growing body is here, my mind is very much elsewhere. The problem is I have no more leave to take, after all the holiday galore I’ve had throughout the year todate. Am itching to go and catch the movies in the cinema. Top movies on my prioroty list at the moment are The Grudge and The Incredibles...

Raya this time was a cross country adventure. My parents celebrate Raya in their hometown in Johor, while my parents-in-law celebrate it at the other end of the Malaysian peninsula in Perak and Kedah. My wife and I covered a distance of no less than 1,000 km throughout the period between the eve of Raya on Saturday and Tuesday. Traffic on the highways during the festive season could be a nightmare however. I was told that up to 2.5 million cars had left KL during the Deepa Raya celebration. The worse of the traffic I encountered was on the return trip to KL from Ipoh on Tuesday night, when we took almost 5 hours to complete a journey which would usually have taken 2 hours under normal circumstances. Lucky I had the best of company with me throughout the journey however... :-)

The drive to the office today and yesterday was a breeze. It took us only 20 minutes to get to work from home. Kalau lah driving kat KL camnih hari2... kan ke baguih. The stress level throughout KL can be reduced as a result. I can only dream for that to happen though...

Oh yeah, and to my blog visitors, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin. And thank you for coming to visit... :-).

An October Tragedy

An October Tragedy

I had promised to write about my honeymoon in NZ in my last entry. But something happened last weekend that probably warrants this to be written first: my house was broken into last Saturday, on the 2nd day of Ramadhan.

When it happened, my family and I were just concluding our Subuh prayers in the main hall of our house, which is on the ground floor. I had heard some strange sounds coming from the roof that morning when I woke up for sahur, but I dismissed it to being sounds made by a cat or monkey, which was always the case. Apparently the robbers came in through the window of my parents’s room, which was the only window in the house that didn’t have grills.

When I saw them coming down and confronted us in the main hall, the situation had not sunk in to me yet, and I thought it was my brother in law. But then it occured to me that my brother in law and my sister were away at his parents’s house that morning. By the time it sunk in, they were already around us, and they were armed with knives and a hammer. My feeling then was one of utmost dread, and I could feel my blood draining from my face. Pucat gila..

One of the robbers repeatedly told us to be quiet and not resist or he would kill us. He kept saying, ‘Kau kalau gerak aku bunuh semuanya. Aku bunuh isteri kau. Aku bunuh kamu nanti.’ They tied all the men in the house, which were my dad, my brother and myself. My father tried to talk to them and reason with them and one of the robbers hit him as a result. We were too stumped to do anything. And I feared the worst.

They told us that they just wanted to rob us, and they had no intention of harming us. Ironically, they kept telling us that they were fellow Muslims, and that they were fasting as we were. Before we knew it, they were ransacking the house for valuables. My dad and I plead that no one was harmed, and one of them made a reassurance that they were Muslims, and they wouldn’t do such a thing. I felt like saying back, ‘orang Islam pun merompak ke’, but my brother, sensing my intention from my expression, gave me a nudge that any answer to his statement wouldn’t be the right one. At least the robber’s reassurance calmed me.

The robbers left the house with our valuables after a ransacking galore that lasted for almost half an hour. It could have been worse. They only left because the house phone rang incessantly, and they got scared. I realised later that they’d been scared all the while they were in the house. It was just a matter of who was more scared between them and us. It turns out the call was made by my wife, who was outside the house washing when the intruders broke into the house. She managed to escape by climbing up our 10 feet tall front gate, and ran to the neighbour's house to get help. To this day, she still wonders how she’d done it, especially when she was wearing kain batik time tuh. You're a hero dear! : - )

My first fear when I saw the intruders in the house was the safety of my mother and my wife. I’ve heard so many tragic stories where the robbers have other intentions than robbing their victims once they’d broken into their house, and it has always been one of my worst nightmares when the robbers have ill-intentions on the women in the house. A friend of my neighbour’s house was broken into, and the robbers did the unspeakable to their daughter in front of them. Nauzubillah...

The general feeling is that around this time of the year, when Raya Aidilfitri is approaching is when robberies become rampant. It is when these people rob to have enough money to either go back to their homes (especially the immigrant labours), or get new stuffs for the big day. Either way it’s wise to be careful. Never take for granted the funny sounds you hear around the house.

Return of The Newly Wed

Return of The Newly Wed

Boy it has been another long hiatus for me. After my last entry on the troubling text messages I had received, I had been very preoccupied with the wedding preparation. Alhamdulillah, the nikah went smoothly well on the 4th of September 2004. The akad had to be done 3 times however, though in no way it was my fault if you please. My now father in law was the one who performed the akad on me, and I am proud to say *ehem*ehem* that I was as cool as ice when I uttered my part of the akad. However, one of the witnesses of the nikah was quite particular about the way the akad sentences were uttered, and we had to repeat the process twice. Not that I’m complaining. Looking back, it gave me the chance to bask in the limelight longer, and savour this one in a lifetime moment. Insya-Allah… :-)

So what can I say about life after marriage? Well, in short I would say it is an enriching experience. Suddenly, I am responsible over someone else’s well being. And I had never been responsible over any other life-being bigger than a gold fish previously! So a great paradigm shift was required here. It feels like a call towards being a more responsible and accountable person. While previously my main concern used to be what strategy to apply for my football Championship Manager game, now it has turned to how should I manage this union that is my marriage. It has only been a month, and I’m still learning.

The best part of marriage is of course the companionship. While previously I had to wake up on my own, now I wake up with a lovely lady beside me. The idea might sound tempting, but some of you might be surprised to know that it is not really the physical part of the relationship that one cherishes the most. It is simply the presence of your significant other, both physically and emotionally, that makes it meaningful. While previously I would have to go over a personal problem on my own, now I have someone to share it with. 2 heads make better work than 1. ‘I’ rarely exist anymore. Most of the time, it’s ‘We’.

We went on our honeymoon between the 22nd September and 2nd October in the land of Lord of The Rings. Look out for my next entry for a rather long account of the whole trip. There will be pics too, so if you don’t care to read what a love-drunken honeymooning husband has to babble, you can always look at the beautiful scenery in the pictures. :-p

Till then, ciao for now!

Text Messages From Hell

Text Messages From Hell

Someone sent me a barrage of sms text messages on the eve of Merdeka Day. His (I still do not know whether the person was a he or she, but let’s for the sake of convenience, assume the person was a he) first text message was a simple wish of Hari Merdeka, followed by a question as to when my wedding was going to take place. I did not have his number saved in my handphone’s phone book, so I did not know who the message was from. I replied his message saying thank you, and asking who he was. I was surprised when he sounded hostile in his reply, to the extent of using such words as ‘pergi blah’ and ‘mampus’. He was ticked off and could not believe that I did not have his number in my phone. Furthermore, he vented his anger that he didn’t get an invitation to my wedding.

I was caught unawares by his reply. I thought if this person was someone I was in regular contact with, I first of all would surely have had his number in my phone. And secondly, chances are I would have also invited him to my wedding. As I’d mentioned in my earlier entry, I’ve had to go through the unenviable task of filtering my guest list for my reception, and I have done so by inviting all those who are in close contacts with me among friends and workmates, those whom I’d have to deal with everyday. So when this guy started swearing because he wasn’t invited, my mind started to run a list of people I might have accidentally missed out. Up to this point, no name have come to my mind yet.

Messages from him kept coming until midnight, even after I’d stopped replying to him. And even after all that, he still did not tell me who he was. I had apologised to him if I had left him out by mistake, but apparently he was undeterred. In the last of his text messages, he accuses me of being ‘damn selfish’ and cruel, and he told me to just wait for the day when the ‘tables are turned’. What does that mean? Have I committed an unforgiveable crime? It seems to me the person might have a feeling of vengeance for me that goes beyond the issue of this wedding invitation. And perhaps this was his best way of letting it out on me. Why else then did he choose to stay anonymous the whole time?

I know how it feels when a friend of yours celebrate a big day, and leaves you out from his invitation. I have a friend whom I’ve known from my studying days, whom I meet almost every week playing futsal and getting together before he was married. You can say, we have the same circle of friends. I did not get his invitation, even after I had accidentally joked with him the WEEKEND BEFORE his wedding about not getting his invitation yet. Yet I still wasn’t invited. But did I go out on a swearing and conscience barrage on this guy? For all I know, he might have had the same constraint as I do now, and had had to keep a straight face whenever his uninvited friends asked him about his wedding.

I know how bad it feels. Believe me, it feels just as bad, if not worse, not being able to invite everyone you know to your most special day and not getting invited to an equivalent event of someone you know. All you can do is hope that people will understand. It seems that you can't please everyone.

The Big Day Looms

The Big Day Looms

I have been a bit quiet of late. Well, in fact it has been more than a month. After my last entry dated 23rd July, I went on a trip with my family from Southampton to London and eventually Edinburgh, where I could not get an internet connection to continue blogging. I’ve been back in Malaysia for almost a month now, and just as I feared, I have not had the decent time to blog. Heck, I have not had any decent idea to write about either.

Coming back to work after a 2 weeks break proved to be quite stressful. I realised while I was away, some of the work were set aside for me until my return. The place I work still lack the mutual knowledge of everyone’s work that it is unimaginable for any of us to leave the office for more than 2 weeks. I went to the office right after the day I arrived in Malaysia, albeit still in a state of jet lag. Have to say many things didn’t quite register in my head in that first few days, but I managed to pull through until the end of the week. The only thing that kept me awake and made me look forward to come to the office nevertheless was to see my fiancee. Could not wait for another day to see her...

This last couple of weeks, I have been busy with the wedding arrangements. Barang2 hantaran semua dah siap, what’s left is the wang hantaran which I would have to withdraw in the form of bank draft sometime this week. Fortunately, I just received my yearly bonus 2 days ago, and the fact that I also received a performance bonus this year helps matters a lot. I tell you, when people say murah rezeki bila nak kahwin nih, they are not lying. We should have faith of the rewards in doing the right things. Banyak berkat.

The only thing that makes me feel slightly upset is the fact that my wedding reception will be held formally in one of the reception halls in KL. Not that I’m complaining about the place (or the fact that my parents are taking the tab completely... thanks mum and dad :-)), it’s just that holding the event there disables me to invite all the people I know. Since my parents are taking the tab for the event, most of the guests will be theirs, which leaves only about 1/6 of the quota for me. I have had to go through the heartbreaking process of filtering my guest list and apologising to some people for not being able to invite them to my reception. It makes me feel bad having to do it, but I guess I have to be fair to my parents too...

The wedding is now just around the corner, and admittedly butterflies have begun to fly around in my stomach, albeit small ones. I think the butterflies will get bigger the closer I get to the date of the nikah. Some cheeky guy friends of mine who have just recently tied the knot themselves have begun to intimidate me with their own experience during the akad. Not to mention their advice on the nocturnal activities of married people. Dang... am looking forward to the big day with a mixture of joy and suspense.

Theme Song Sephia-Samarinda

Theme Song Sephia-Samarinda

The following song is the theme song for the Samarinda drama series that has just recently ended on TV3, titled Sephia. The drama series ended up to be a tragedy of sorts; a whole family was wiped out, due to the evil deeds and ill-doings of one person in that family. In the end, a woman lost the love of her life through an incurable disease, after having lost him earlier due to the circumstances of his family conflict.

A tragic story of life and unfulfilled love.

Get this widget | Track details | eSnips Social DNA

(Tip to listen to the song: Click pause at the page default music widget at the right bottom of the side bar before clicking on play on the above widget to avoid the 2 music overlapping. TQ!)

Berhenti Berharap
By Sheila on 7

Aku tak percaya lagi
Dengan apa yang kau beri
Aku terdampar disini
Tersudut menunggu mati

Aku tak percaya lagi
Akan guna matahari
Yang dulu mampu terangi
Sudut gelap hati ini

Aku berhenti berharap
Dan menunggu datang gelap
Sampai nanti suatu saat
Tak ada cinta kudapat

Kenapa ada derita
Bila bahagia tercipta
Kenapa ada sang hitam
Bila putih menyenangkan

Aku pulang..
Tanpa dendam..
Kuterima kekalahanku

Aku pulang..
Tanpa dendam..
Kusalutkan kemenanganmu

Kau ajarkan aku bahagia
Kau ajarkan aku derita
Kau tunjukkan aku bahagia
Kau tunjukkan aku derita
Kau berikan aku bahagia
Kau berikan aku derita

[ rebahkan rambutmu lepaskan perlahan
kau akan mengerti semua.. ]

Aku berhenti berharap
Dan menunggu datang gelap
Sampai nanti suatu saat
Tak ada cinta kudapat

My Brother’s Graduation

My Brother’s Graduation

Today was my younger brother’s graduation ceremony. He is now a graduate of Southampton University. Congratulations Didi!

Interestingly, my own graduation was on the 21st July in the year 2000. That was 4 years and 1 day ago to be exact.

Among the outstanding feature of today’s graduation ceremony, apart from seeing my brother go onstage and collect his scroll from the Vice Chancellor, was to witness the achievement of 2 physically challenged students to graduate along with the other normal physically-able students. One of the special students was blind, and the other, if I am not mistaken, is suffering from the same condition as the brilliant Stephen Hawking. The applause that they received when they went to collect their respective scrolls was deafening and you could feel the inspiration that they exuded to the guests in the graduation hall. It makes you feel amazed at what one can achieve, regardless of one’s physical condition, if one has the grit and determination to succeed.

I certainly can learn from their success.

After the ceremony was the customary post-ceremony reception. The food served was abundant, and if only they were all halal, I would have eaten more than just the egg roll and the chocolate muffin I had. There were all sorts of rolls, pastries and puffs. Well, I guess it’s good that I wasn’t able to eat most of the food served since I am supposed to be on a diet anyway.

My dad had his customary photo in a graduation gown taken, wearing my brother’s gown. My dad did the same thing at my older sister’s graduation and mine too, posing as if he was the graduate himself. Only this time around, my mum and yours truly joined him in his ritual. Hehe.. it brings back the memory of my own graduation all over again.

Once again, congrats Didi!

Of Men and Buses

Of Men and Buses

While waiting for the bus today, I was reminded of a poem that I first came across just before my graduation 4 years ago. I had bought a book of a compilation of the top 500 poems voted as most popular in that year (2000). I bought it because I just felt like reading something different, or maybe because I was driven by the notion that women find men who could recite poetry to them attractive. Do they?

The poem cheekily makes a comparison between men and buses, which I am sure some of the women out there would agree. :-) Funnily, it only serves to remind me how the bus I used to take in my studying days to the university would always come in twos and threes after I'd waited for one for what would seem like eternity.

Enjoy!

Bloody Men

Wendy Cope, 1945 -

Bloody men are like bloody buses
You wait for about a year
And as soon as one approaches your stop
Two or three others appear.

You look at them flashing their indicators,
Offering you a ride.
You're trying to read the destinations,
You haven't much time to decide.

If you make a mistake, there is no turning back.
Jump off, and you'll stand there and gaze
While the cars and the taxis and lorries go by
And the minutes, the hours, the days.

A Shopping Expedition

A Shopping Expedition

Yesterday was another day of shopping and window shopping around the town of Southampton. I have to admit that these are 2 skills that I am not quite good at. When I do shop, I would usually have in mind what I want before hand, go to the particular place where I know I can get what I want, race to the payment counter as quickly as possible for payment, and leave. If I stay around longer and ponder upon the choices on display, I would begin to feel heady, and everything on the shelf would start to look the same to me. That is when I begin to feel sleepy, and thus start to yawn incessantly.

But yesterday, I was accompanying my mother (or rather she was assisting me) with the business of shopping and window shopping. Keeping up with her was quite a challenge. We were looking for a handbag for my fiancée as part of my hantaran to her for the wedding. We must have gone to not less than 10 retail outlets yesterday. My mum was in her mettle, looking through the sea of handbags on display, and assessing the shapes and designs like a pro.

At the beginning of our quest yesterday, I still managed to be helpful and gave her my opinions of the choices she showed me, with my fiancée’s preferred design in mind. But after the 3rd shop, all the handbags began to look the same to me, and in one instance, I even mistook a whole shelf of woman’s knickers for fancy handbags. My mum however managed to keep her composure, and was still making comparisons of the designs of the different handbags from the various shops we’d been to in her head. It amazes me how she could still recall a particular handbag she’d seen 3 shops ago when I could barely remember how the interior of that particular shop looked like by that time.

So as we progressed to what must have seem our hundredth shop of the day, myself and my brother (who had to tag along to give directions) went into cruise control, and just tagged along with our go-getting mum with minimal fuss and question. My mum was, still however in full vigour by that time, eyeing any women’s accessories shop or general store that we might have missed out, while my brother and I were close to being like casualties of a failed search expedition.

My mum chided me by saying I should begin to get used to this since I might have to answer more of this call of duty once I’m married. I guess I should. What made the shopping experience yesterday difficult was the fact that I was getting increasingly unsure whether I would be getting the right handbag design in the end. It’s not that I’m getting this for myself you see. And judging from all the handbags on display yesterday, I could not recall them to being in close resemblance to the ones my fiancée and I had surveyed earlier. I have to say the designs here are less conservative (or rather not conservative enough to my liking, given the purpose I’m buying it for), which I find it an irony since the British are known for their conservatism.

In the end, we didn’t manage to find a suitable handbag yesterday. General Zaleha will continue search operation with Corporal Izwan and Chief Navigator Didi at a later mentioned time.

Mum, I take my hat off to you!

Early Morning Musings

Early Morning Musings

It is coming to my 3rd day in the UK today. I am still adjusting to the sleeping time here, feeling sleepy at the wrong time all the time. For instance, I slept right after Asar time yesterday (which was around 5 pm), and woke up just before the end of Maghrib, which in the summer time fortunately ends when Isya’ starts at 11.38pm. It is 5.45 am at the moment, and the sun is already up out there. That’s summer time for you in England, or rather, in countries that experience 4 seasons.

The good thing about not being able to sleep at night and early in the morning is that it gives me more time to ponder and tinker with my blog. And it is a great help that I have my younger brother around to show me a tip or two on computers and things that I can do to enhance the face of my blog. He’s an IT graduate you see, so this IT stuff is his daily language. It’s refreshing just sitting down at the comp with him and see him doing stuffs on the computer. Interestingly, with all his IT knowledge, he’d yet to create his own blog till today. It’s still under construction tho, so I’ll keep the address a secret till it’s ready. Hehe…

Right now, my next project on this blog is to get some others’s blogs I’ve been visiting linked on mine. I’ve registered with BlogRolling, but I still can’t figure how to get the links to appear on my blog. Kena explore lagi nih.. and get my IT consultant to do it for me. These are interesting times for my blog. Hehe…

Back In The UK

Back In The UK
 
I am back in the UK again. Boy it has been four long years since I was last here. It feels good to be back. I am actually here for my brother’s graduation from Southampton University and will be here for 2 weeks. I already have many places in mind that I am planning to revisit here, especially in London, where my alma mater is. I can’t help feeling guilty though for being away from the office for that long. I guess I’ve spent so much of my time at work (even over weekends at times) that being away for this long has a funny effect on my conscience. But I guess the time away from the office should be good to revitalise my jaded body and mind. The only other thing that makes my coming to the UK a bit heavy is the thought of not seeing my fiancée for 2 weeks. Funny how 2 weeks appear like a very long time to be on leave now when 1 month of winter and Easter break seem like a short time in my studying days.
 
I arrived at Heathrow airport on Friday evening on a flight that left KL on the same day in the afternoon. The flight here was ok. The in-flight movie was nothing to stir up any excitement, so I was more content on playing the online video games for most of the journey (boy, time did fly when you’re playing video games). I was seated next to a spoilt kid who kept screaming to her mum for anything, or when her mum was not paying her enough attention. She must be around 7-8 years old. Rasa cam nak lempang je budak camtuh… she was throwing things around in occasional tantrums and yours truly occasionally found some food debris and snack wrappers on his lap and tray as a result. Can’t her mum tell her to behave? And her whole family was talking to each other so loud (there were 6 of them in all) you could be forgiven for thinking the whole family was deaf.
 
Anyway, I then took a bus from the airport to Southampton. The first thing I did before taking the bus was buying a newspaper. Boy, do I miss the papers here. The page 3 of The Sun Newspaper here is WAY much more interesting than The Sun in Malaysia. Those who’ve been to the UK would now… :-). But I settled for The Daily Mail for a light read on the bus. Since Southampton wasn’t exactly the bus’s last stop, I had to make sure that I was conscious when I reached my stop. I was lucky. Woke up from my slumber just as the bus pulled up at the bus station in Southampton. Imagine ending up in Salisbury at 11 at night with no where to go.. 
 
Woke up at 5 am yesterday (had to, since the sun rises at 5.10 am. Kalau tak tak Subuh le jawapnya…). We all went to London yesterday, taking the 6.22 am bus from Southampton. The first thing that struck me about London was how familiar the place was still to me. I could still remember the Underground lines and the buses to take, and when walking along Oxford Street yesterday, I felt like I never left the place at all. The only thing that I forgot was how many people there always were in London, and the dodging you have to do when walking along Oxford Street to avoid walking into almost everyone else. Like my dad aptly said it, ‘macam ulat tahi’. With myself barely recovered from the jet-lag of my long journey and the time difference, it felt almost surreal, more like I was walking in a dream (it was already late at night in Malaysia by that time. So I guess it was only natural that I felt that way). 
 
 

Me at Portobello Road. (Picture courtesy of my very IT literate brother)

 
Didn’t get to go to many other places I wanted to in London yesterday though, as we spent most of our time in Portobello Road and Oxford Street yesterday. Would love to be back in a few days and go to places like Piccadilly Circus, Leicester Square, walking along the River Thames, the LSE (my alma mater), the West End, and the Covent Garden just to name a few places.
 
Oh well, I have another long English summer day ahead of me. Hmm… what am I going to do today? Gi car boot sale? Or just enjoy walking around town in Southampton? Might as well make the best of it while I’m still here…
 
Gonna file a report to my beloved fiancée first.. :p. Cheerio.

Am Back Again!

Am Back Again!

Boy it has been a long time since my last posting. I realise that that the most conducive time I have for blogging is either very late at night on the rare occassions that I don’t get too tired, or when I’m in the office waiting for my fiancee to finish her work. Also I’ve not had much inspiration to write of late. That is not to say that life hasn’t been interesting since the last time I wrote. Oh yeah, many good things have happened since.

Among others, remember that disastrous exam I wrote about a couple of weeks ago? Turns out it wasn’t a disaster after all. I managed to pass the exam somehow!! This one could be filed up as an X-File case. With only the chance to look into the study material for about 10 minutes before the exam, I was hoping more for a miracle than anything else. Even felt like skipping the exam altogether and fork another RM 200++ to sit for another session. I was quite lucky of course that the exam was a multiple choice questions in nature and I was able to use the art of deduction in determining the right answers. I am glad that I did not lose on hope and went to do the exam still.

Moral of the story: Never lose out on hope. A favourite quote of mine from this movie says it quite aptly:

Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free.

And anyhow, got linked to this quiz via a fellow blogger’s site. A rather interesting quiz that’s suppose to describe your character from the alphabets that make your name. Since I’m usually called by 2 names by my friends (Khalil) and family (Izwan) respectively, I thought I’d do the quiz twice, once for each name. And here’s the result. Boy do I wish they are true... Amiin!

K	Kinky
H	Helpful
A	Ambivalent
L	Luxurious
I	Intelligent
L	Legendary

Name / Username:

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

I	Inspirational
Z	Zonked
W	Wonderful
A	Ambivalent
N	Natural

Name / Username:

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

An Advice From Granny

An Advice From Granny

My grandma, who lives with me and my family these days, called me yesterday with a look of concern on her face and told me that she had something important to tell me. Judging by the expression on her face and her tone of voice, I was beginning to feel slightly wary what the matter was about. The whole conversation went on more or less like the following:

Atuk: Wan, atuk nak cakap sikit… duduk sini kejap..

Me: Apa dia tuk?

Atuk: Kau esok bila dah kahwin, kau jangan ‘bersama’ dulu dengan isteri kau sampai sudah bersanding.

Me: (slightly taken aback, but could not help smiling..) Kenapa lak tuk?

Atuk: Nanti hilang seri pengantinnya… tak molek nanti bila duduk bersanding..

Me: (I just could not help pushing the conversation further…) Ye ke tuk? Ada beza ke rupa kita kalau bersama dengan tak bersama? Wan tengok kawan2 Wan yang dah kahwin nampak cam sama je rupa diorang..

Atuk: (With a look of incredulity on her face and her tone of voice…) Ehh mana leh sama. Lain cu.. orang kalau dah bersama muka dia gini2 haa… (showing me an expression of what the hilang-seri-look looks like) Lain seri orang kahwin ngan seri orang bujang… kalau boleh molek la masa bersanding tu ada seri orang bujang lagi…

Me: (I egged her on…) Orang boleh perasan ke tuk bezanya? (will people be able to tell the difference granny?)

Atuk: Ehh.. mana leh tak perasan.. orang perasanlah… (again, with a tone of incredulity in her voice)

Later that night as I was about to go to bed, I went to see her and to show my appreciation for her such ‘concern’, thanked her for her kindly advice. Before I left she added:

Atuk: Nanti atuk nak tunjuk Wan sesuatu… kena tahu apa nak buat bila dah kahwin nanti.. kau kena tanya ngan orang2 tua petua dah kahwin…

I didn’t dare to ask her to elaborate further on that statement. Since she was still talking in innuendos when she referred to the thing that she wanted to show me, I figured it might be something that I wouldn’t want to see it from her. Petua2 orang dah kahwin? I wonder what petua she might have meant? Hmmm…

It’s funny the things that could be of concern to your elderly, where we don’t seem to think so much of. Will give some thought to your advice grandma. If I could wait for 12 years, I guess I could extend it for a few more days… Haha!

Thanks granny! : - )

Stress Management and The Most Valuable Gift Of All

Stress Management and The Most Valuable Gift Of All

It has been a long week. At the beginning of this week, I felt like I was saturating from too much stress at work. I guess that’s one problem that that I need to find the cure to. I’ve not exactly been that good in handling stress. Most of the time when push comes to shove, I would freeze and find myself lost in thought and action. I guess my problem lies in the fact that when faced with a situation or a problem, I tend to focus too much on the problem itself, rather than looking through it for the solution. I keep having to remind myself of the good message that I picked up from the movie Patch Adams, when the genius professor who was admitted to the asylum for the mentally insane (probably for being too genius) showed Hunter Adams (played by Robin Williams) what the problem was with most people’s perception; when faced with a situation or problem, too often we are stuck without a solution, or maybe we take too much time to find a solution which could turn out to be simple, because our minds are too burdened by the problem at hand. This is something I need to change and work on.

Anyhow, while in my effort to distract myself from the loads of work and pressing datelines at the office, I took some time to look through some forwarded e-mails that I received and kept in my archive files. I came across the following story while I was at it. It serves as a good reminder to all of us that sometimes the most precious gift that we can give to our loved ones is the simplest of things. Our company and our time. Too often, we become too engrossed in the rat race that we are in that we forget the things that are more important to us than our work. Our loved ones.

Make sure you make the time for them. Leave the office early, or take a few days off work and make that long-postponed visit to your hometown to see your old folks. Believe me, the time you make for those you love is the most precious gift you can give them. Well, even J Lo says that her Love Don’t Cost a Thing…

It is kinda long, but worth the read. Hope you’ll enjoy the story.

Thanks For Your Time

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could
stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday." Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown.

Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box? " Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was the thing I value most,'" Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox.

"Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package.

The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.

"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope.

Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter.

His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover.

Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack, Thanks for your time! Harold
Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days.

"Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said.

"Oh, by the way, Janet...thanks for your time!"

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the
moments that take our breath away."

Have a great day and thank you for your time...

My Favourite Poem

My Favourite Poem

It’s been a long day. Am still in the office with so much more to do. At the moment, I just have to take a 10 – 15 minutes break. If only my financial situation was much healthier than it is, the 15 minutes break could have had its venue in San Francisco Coffee, or maybe Delifrance or Cinnabon. But the combination of my restraint finances and the hurricane of work has made me to settle for the coffee in the office pantry. A nice blend of Nescafe and Milo should do the trick. Hmmm....

Anyhow, I would like to share this poem with you. Chances are, you woudln’t find this poem a stranger. I was first introduced to this poem from watching The Simpsons Halloween special when I was in my secondary school. There is something dark and gothic about it that makes it very appealing. For instance, the crow’s queer repetition of the phrase ‘never more’ when faced with the narrator. This would seem queer until you begin to wonder whether the bird is saying anything at all (‘Never more’), or is it just a subject of the narrator’s own failing sanity i.e. Is he hearing things or is the bird really saying those words? It subsequently inclines the reader to feel sympathy for the narrator, yet at the same time makes the reader wonder whether or not the evil presence is real in the shape of the crow. Either way, it subtly portrays the mental state of a depressed person trying to cope with the loss of a loved one.

I once memorised the whole poem for my school’s poem reading competition while I was doing my A-Levels in the UK. The judges must have been impressed that a non-English person (some of them were even impressed that I could speak English as a matter of fact!) could memorise such a long poem that I even qualified to the latter round of the competition. Come to think of it, funny how such a simple thing as poem could bring back memories from the past...

I’ve included excerpts of the poem here. For a complete, long version of The Raven, click here.

And if you want something more fanciful, you can go here for impressions of the poem with pictures. This is a good one.

Enjoy!

The Raven

[First published in 1845]

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
`'Tis some visitor,' I muttered, `tapping at my chamber door -
Only this, and nothing more.'

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; - vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the lost Lenore -
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named Lenore -
Nameless here for evermore.

My Best Friends’ Wedding and My Worst Nightmare Came True

My Best Friends’ Wedding and My Worst Nightmare Came True


Boy. It has been a while since I last wrote. Have to say that I have been rather caught up with work since my last entry. But that is not to say nothing interesting happened since. There were definitely some interesting moments in that time.

Friday, 26th March 2004

First of all, 2 of my good friends just recently got married. They held a reception at the Dewan Perdana Felda on 26th March, and a grand wedding it was. Proudly, I was given the honour by both of them to give a speech on that night. Not so surprisingly considering that I have been partly responsible in getting them together, or so I would like to think. They first fell for each other at my house when I was hosting a function, and later on, upon the request from the girl, I called the guy up and coaxed him to ask her out. I don’t think he even knows yet that I called him that night because she asked me to (so if you’re ever reading this, now you know!). He still thinks that I told him to ask her out on a hunch. Hehe.. Anyways, that was almost 15 months ago and I am kinda impressed that things have progressed this far between them. They really are a lovely and loving couple and they do belong to each other. Congrats Azahar and Abrizah!

Preparing the speech for their reception wasn’t exactly an easy task. I guess it would be easier to prepare a talk or ceramah, in which the contents would be more specific. I felt like there were too many things to say, and too short a time to deliver it. Not to mention the hungry guests’ patience, since I was to deliver the speech before dinner. Somehow, I managed to get my speech finalized on the morning of the reception itself, and managed to give a rather good delivery of it that night. My friends’ in the audience thought that the speech was rather mushy2, but hey, it’s a wedding okay, not a political party rally. I thought you were supposed to sound mushy at weddings, and paint glowing impressions of the groom and bride. I felt a great sense of relief after I was done delivering the speech, and funny enough, I felt like I wouldn’t mind doing it again. The truth be told, I had originally been rather nervous about doing it ever since I was asked to do it. I accepted at first because I felt too honored to refuse it. There were even times that I felt that I might not be up for it, and felt like maybe I should just bail out. But in the end of the day, I’m glad that I did it. In fact, I feel like I’ve become comfortable at speaking publicly in front of a big audience (there must have been around 600 – 700 guests that night) since that night.

Moral of the story: to people with stage fright like me out there. Go out and do something that you’ve never done before, or something that would go beyond your usual comfort zone. You will feel, like I have, that once you’ve gone beyond that, you will discover new frontiers of the things you could do.

Saturday, 27th March 2004

What happened over the weekend was nothing short of tragedy. Really, I only have myself to blame for what happened. Ever had a bad dream when you find yourself in an exam hall, sitting for an exam, and feeling that you’re so ill-prepared for it? Or another bad dream when you wake up late on the first day of your SPM or degree exams, and you have only half an hour before the exam begins? Well, both of that actually happened to me on this day! The exam was supposed to be an easy one, and I was supposed to be able to ace it with minimal revision. If only I had the chance to revise for it that is. I thought the exam was going to be on Sunday afternoon, and was actually only going to look into my notes on that Saturday night. Imagine my horror when a friend of mine who also sat for the exam called me up and told me that the exam was to start in half an hour. And I was just about to get comfy for an afternoon siesta! Well, the rest is history as they say. The exam was a multiple choice one, and I was Billy the Kid himself, firing away at possible answers to questions I had no clue what the answers were. Oh well…

Moral of the story: Bring dices to a multiple choice question exams. It sure makes selecting an answer easier than blindly choosing one when you have no clue what the answer is.